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In the answers to the Common Questions, unless specifically addressing this issue,we assume that there has been both a civil divorce and a Catholic "annulment" (properly called a Decree of Nullity).Thus, using common language, the absent spouse is properly referred to as "ex" or "former".

Though they are polar opposites; her need of stability is fulfilled with him, his need of optimism is fulfilled with her.Each situation will require certain steps but for most couples this is a time for patience, practical planning and doing the following: (1) Ask God to help you keep your primary focus on Him and His will for you. Over time they'll come back and the hurt will be recycled.In a certain sense, the marriage--whether valid or not, salvageable or not--is secondary to your love for and faithfulness to God. Remember: If there's infidelity, addiction or other sinful behavior going on, refuse to let it back into your life and home. It means get help and let your intellect lead, not your emotions (fear, guilt, regret, etc.) (4) .If there is no Decree of Nullity, the other person is still a spouse even if common life has ended. (2) Try to clearly identify how you two got to this point so that you can work to solve the crises.Divorce is hard enough, but separation has its own unique pain because there's no finality, no apparent moving back or forward. The first thing to do is stay open to reconciliation, if possible. Many couples make a sincere effort to get back together, but their core problems have not been addressed.

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